I would say that 99% of the conflicts in my marriage are solvable. I would also say that our success rate of solving those problems is 100%. That 1% perpetual problem is never mended. 100% failure is the record against that 1%. My husband and I take turns bending until we snap, and we just keep going at it. Neither one of us is willing to let it alone.
What is the cut and dry end result wanted for sons when they grow up and leave home? To serve a mission and get married in the Temple. I have a teenage son from a previous marriage that is the constant source of a perpetual problem with my husband. If my son were to go and live with his father, the likelihood of him remaining active in church, going on a mission, or getting married in the temple would be significantly low. I feel an intense responsibility to keep my son in my home where he is happily active in early morning seminary, mid week youth group, daily prayer and scripture study, and Sunday school. He has a desire to serve a mission in three years he will be able to. Even though my husband and I perpetually disagree on how my son is doing, his presence in our life is the ideal environment not only for him, but through his example, our other children.
The bending that takes place now is a constant back and forth of one of us trying a behavior that the other has suggested. I have asked my husband, who is not a big touchy person, to hug my teenager, who is a very touchy person. My husband in turn will place conditions on my teenager of having had a shower and put on deodorant if he wants a hug from him.
It could be that the mending will occur in three years when my son has left on a mission for our church, or moved out.
I wonder what perpetual problem will take its place?
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